Husband
by samashhh
Summary: She looked up and faced his grey pooling eyes.“You don’t get it Draco. I don’t want this, this marriage of ours, you’ve lied, and you’ve cheated, how can you expect me to stay married to you?” “Because you love me.” He said. HGDM [Spoilers from HBP & DH]


**Husband:**

**Definition:**

Cheater: Liar, Killer, and Death Eater; Why Marry? (ONESHOT)

**P.S. Spoilers for HBP**

**Pairings:** Hermione/Draco

**Era: **Post-Hogwarts

**Genre:** Angst/Romance

"_When life gets you down, the only way is to pick up the pieces and move on."_

**How can I pretend that I don't see  
What you hide so carelessly?  
I saw her bleed**

When thinking you live in this perfect world, but clearly no one really knows who you really are. There's a slight chance that people will stare at you and point fingers, whispering and gossiping like there's no tomorrow. She stared out the window, perplexed by the atmosphere and the rain that was pouring down. When had life gotten so complicated for her, when did she imagine this?

Sucked into the mind games of lies and broken hearts; she never signed up for this, yet she had no choice. She looked around the room, noticing those small insignificant items that held no purpose for her. She continued to stare out the window she didn't have anyone left to talk too. Her friends had betrayed her, she had no remaining family and she had no one. Her husband had ruined her life; destroyed every opinion she had ever made, every decision. She felt nothing no more. She had no heart, no thoughts to run through her head. She was a gust of wind.

She approached the kitchen counter, and pulled opened one of the counter drawers. Adding sub mindedly that there will be no tomorrow for her, she just couldn't keep track anymore. The years had gone by without her, accomplishing nothing at all.

**You heard me breathe  
And I froze inside myself  
And turned away  
I must be dreaming**

She took the knife from the drawer, what was to stop her now?

"Hermione? What in the world are you doing?" he asked.

Hermione turned around to face him. She smiled briefly, taking a deep breath.

He took hold of her wrist, and removed the knife from her hand. "I asked you a question Hermione, what are you doing?"

"I'm not doing anything."

"Bullshit!" he said, "this isn't a game Hermione, don't do this."

"I'm tired; I'm tired of all the lies. I have no friends, no family and the only reason why I'm still living is because of you. You promised, you said you wouldn't do it again."

"I've been true to my word."

"No, no you haven't. You're only saying that so I'd get on your good graces, but not anymore. I can't keep living like this, you're a murderer Draco!"

"It's my job."

"No! You can walk away, just like everyone else."

"He'll kill me."

"So what, I'm supposed to believe that what you are doing is for the common good. I don't think so!"

"I can't help what he decides, this isn't my choice anymore."

"It was your choice when you decided to join."

"I was under pressure, my father wanted me to join, and there was no alternative."

"Oh do I suppose that it's my fault then." Hermione exclaimed. "Did I ruin your life so badly that I-" She couldn't finish her sentence as the tears started to fall, and they weren't stopping.

Her husband moved from where he was standing towards her but she pushed him away.

"Stay away from me! Please, I- I can't do this anymore."

He tried to comfort her as best as he could, "Shh, it's going to be okay, alright we'll figure this out."

**We all live  
We all die  
That does not begin to justify you**

"No, no it's not." She continued to sob. "I'm done Draco, no more. I can't live like this."

"Hermione, please stop, we've been through this a million times before. What's so different this time?" He persisted.

Hermione looked up and faced his grey pooling eyes. That held so little emotion in them that she was sure she'd fall and surrender everything she ever felt strong about and that was saying a lot. "You don't get it Draco. I don't want this, this marriage of ours, you've lied, and you've cheated, how can you expect me to stay married to you?"

"Because you love me." He said.

Hermione was about to protest to those accusations but he was right, she couldn't deny that fact. Maybe that was why she never had this conversation with him. Why she could never believe in herself or why she had no one left in her life.

"Then why lie?" she asked after some time had passed.

"I don't do it on purpose; it's this simple fact in believing and trusting me, _Hermione_."

"Just because I didn't deny the fact that I love you doesn't give you the right to kill everything else. My heart is broken Draco, what more could you possibly take?"

He stared at her for a moment to take the time to answer her question. "I'm not trying to take anything away from you. You are my wife Hermione, and unless we were divorced we are together till one of us dies. You don't get it do you, I'm doing this to protect you, not to hurt you."

"How can you possibly say that, I trusted you with my life Draco, and where am I now? I sit at home and wait for you to come, and you follow the Dark Lord's decisions and do his filthy bidding all day. You had to be the one to get that mark, that filthy mark. Maybe I was better off being a mudblood to you, that way at least I'd be happy."

"Don't go and blame all of this on me, alright? We agreed that this would be the best way, so stop trying to convince me otherwise."

"I'm sick of it, the funny thing about all of this, this marriage we have." Hermione said motioning with her hands. "You've never once told me you loved me."

"I do."

**It's not what it seems  
Not what you think  
No I must be dreaming**

"No Draco, I need to hear you say it, otherwise I don't think I'll ever be able to live again, to be the same Hermione everyone thought I was, the girl I was back in school."

"Why is this so important to you?"

"Because without those words what point is there to this marriage, I can deal with you being a death eater, and you biding by Voldermort's rules, but I cannot and will not be able to live and breathe in the same room as you without knowing the truth. They are the only words that will keep me here."

Draco had to think, to breathe. His wife was planning on leaving him, after so much hard work he put into making this marriage work. He had to admit that when they first started going out, it was off to rocky start, but that had been years ago.

_He'd been sitting in the Slytherin common room, going through his textbooks, when he found a note. Not some ordinary note but a suicide note, the handwriting was shaky and a bit hard to make out. He wondered who in their right mind would do something like this. He wasn't prepared for this, he had his initiation coming up in the next two weeks and he did not want to be put down by this note. He had to please his father whether it was the last thing he did. He opened the note carefully making sure that none of the other students were watching him. Crabbe and Goyle were in a corner stuffing them selves full of food. He shook his head trying to clear his thoughts and began to read the letter._

'_Dear whom this may concern,_

_I know I've lived long enough to know that I can't deal with this pain anymore. The killings that are going through this school are enough to drive anyone over the edge. You may be wondering why I'm writing this, and the fact is someone needs to know the truth, the truth that everyone seems to forget. _

_You are going to die! Whether it's now, in the war, or further into your future when you're old and gray. I'm saying goodbye, I'm ending my life from now on, I won't and can't stand up here and pretend that everything is going to be okay because I know it's not. I've never been a social person nor did I have many friends, and even my enemies, I would have loved to say I'm sorry._

_With this said, I'm leaving my last regrets to you, a complete stranger, in hoping that maybe one day, someone will realized what is clearly right in front of them._

_Silence, is all I have left._

_H.G.'_

_Draco finished reading the letter, shocked and quite frankly frightened. He didn't know what came over him but he rushed out of his common and down the corridors to the Gryffindor Tower. He didn't care about her, he was just concerned, and yes that was it. Well that's at least what he told himself. He didn't know what convinced him to do it, the thought of her dying made his mind and his heart shudder at even the thought. Granger was no ordinary girl but this war was tearing this school apart. He knew it was partly his fault, after Snape left, he hadn't even thought about coming back to school, no one would have wanted him there._

_He approached the Gryffindor common room, seeing that the Fat Lady was indeed in her portrait._

"_Password?"_

_Of course, he didn't know the password; he'd have to simply guess. He thought about it for a moment before answering._

"_Quidditch through the ages." He replied._

_He was relieved when the portrait opened up for him. He also knew it was likely for it to open for him again the next time he needed to come around here. He walked in the common room, to see bright colors and warmness of the fire nearby. He also knew he wouldn't be able to get up to the girls common room, it was a special charm the late Dumbledore had placed in all girl's dormitories._

_He took his wand out, and whispered a spell. "Accio broom."_

_Not moments passed and his new and improved broom appeared before him, clutching the handle and placing himself over his broom he zoomed passed the staircase and onto the landing and reached the 7th year girls dorm room. He didn't think it'd be wise for him self to be seen, so he took his wand out again and placed an invisibility spell over himself and opened the door._

_What he saw to his relief that she herself was in the room, the only one in fact and she was crying; hysterically crying. He walked further into the room, trying not to make anymore sounds than his feet could possibly make._

_He could hear her muttering herself through her tears as they continued to fall down her face. He didn't know why he was still in the room; he'd never seen her look this vulnerable before, it was unnerving and very peculiar to him. _

"_Why Harry, when will the nightmares stop?" she muttered._

_Draco tried to make the least noise possible, but luck didn't seem to be on his side as he stepped on a book, flying it across the room. Hermione heard the noise and turned around, her crying had finally stopped. Draco stared at her through her blotched face and tear stricken cheeks, never seen her look this way before. He knew she was a strong person and could handle her own ground, but this was a different side of her he'd never seen._

"_Who's there?" she whispered. She walked further into the room from where she was standing in the corner. "I know someone's here."_

_The heavy breathing he suddenly couldn't control, and knew in an instant that Granger could hear him. He pulled out his wand and took the invisibility spell off him, and stood in front of her. She held a look of surprise before she put on her defense mode, one he'd seen so many times before._

"_Malfoy? What do you want?"_

_He didn't say anything for a moment. "Oh right, of course how could I forget, come to kill me have we? Just waiting for the right mudblood to kill right? Well go on, go ahead."_

"_I'm not here to kill you Granger."_

"_Oh really? Could have fooled me, your in the Gryffindor girls dormitory. You put an invisibility spell over yourself so no one would see you coming in, and you have your wand out, I think it's self explanatory don't you think?"_

"_I'm not here to kill you." He repeated._

"_Okay maybe not, of course not, you don't have your dark mark yet, right?"_

"_No."_

**It's only in my mind  
Not in real life  
No I must be dreaming**

"_What are you doing here Malfoy?" she asked suddenly._

"_I think you dropped this." He handed her the letter she had written when he found it in his textbook._

_She took it from him, slowly brushing their fingers together. "Thank you."_

_She glanced at the letter, and realized what it was, and why she had written it. Why did it have to be Draco Malfoy?_

"_You- you didn't read this did you?"_

"_What if I did?"_

"_Where did you find this?"_

"_It was in my textbook. Look Granger I didn't come here to answer your stupid questions, I just thought you might like that letter back." Draco said, heading towards the exit. _

"_Wait!"_

_He turned around to face her. "Yes…?"_

"_Why did you really come here? Why me of all people, I'm nothing but a mudblood to you."_

"_Believe me Granger, this war is nothing but a scandal, no one's going to live by the end, and your precious Potter, won't live to save the day."_

"_Why are you telling me this?"_

"_Because you said it yourself; in your letter."_

_She was taken at back by his response and wasn't sure what to say until she finally decided to speak her mind._

"_Why did you come back?"_

_He faced her again and looked her in the eyes. "I don't know, after what happened last year I wasn't sure I was coming back."_

"_Why did you do it?"_

"_Do what? Draco asked._

"_Try to kill Dumbledore near the astronomy tower?"_

"_Do you want the honest truth?"_

"_Yes…" she said hesitantly._

"_When I was summoned by the Dark Lord, I was scared, that much I could tell you. I wasn't really expecting much, after all my father was a death eater and I knew he wasn't going to stay in Azkaban for long, he'd break out just like Sirius Black. He told me the task of killing Dumbledore, I was shocked. I wasn't expecting it, nor did I know that I couldn't do it alone. Snape knew about my task, and tried helping me. That's when I knew I could never ever kill Dumbledore. No matter how cruel I've been to everyone, I wasn't a murderer."_

**Help you know I've got to tell someone  
Tell them what I know you've done  
I fear you but spoken fears can come true**

"_But how can you say that? Harry saw you, you had your wand pointing towards Dumbledore, you were about to say the curse."_

"_But I stopped myself, and wait -, how do you know Potter was there, I didn't see him there."_

_She stayed quiet; she didn't know whether or not she should be telling her sworn enemy about things he shouldn't know. He was a death eater, or he was to become one quite soon. She couldn't tell him. But somehow she found that could trust him among other things._

"_He was under an invisibility cloak."_

"_Then why didn't he stop Snape then?" Draco asked._

"_Why didn't you?"_

_He didn't say anything for a few moments, "I couldn't."_

"_Why?" Hermione asked. She hadn't noticed how close she was to him. She was glad for once that the girl's dormitory was abandoned. She wouldn't be quite sure what she'd do if someone found her here with her sworn enemy talking. It was strange after all these years, all the bickering, fighting, hexing. They were finally meeting eye to eye on one thing, the war was changing them._

"_Nothing's ever going to be the same is it?" she asked switching the topic; she didn't want to talk about last year anymore._

**We all live  
We all die  
That does not begin to justify you**

"_No, it's never been and it will never be."_

"_I hate you."_

_Draco walked towards her and even though through Hermione's vulnerability, he could admit that even though he hated her, he couldn't help but feel drawn to her at the same time._

_He kissed her softly, barely, as if their lips hadn't touched._

"_Don't worry Granger, the feeling is mutual."_

He couldn't imagine what life would have been like had he not fell for the Gryffindor Princess as she was. The final battle itself was cruel. He fought for the death eaters, while as she fought for the Order. None were either alike yet they shared the same feelings. They couldn't bare to be apart yet if they ever came face to face, they would kill.

Only now, he couldn't handle the pressure, and the life he was leading was just too much. The deeds the Dark Lord were perpetrating him, his only way out was through Hermione. Only now she wanted to give up on him too, forget him. Draco couldn't let that happen. He may have been ruthless but truth be told, he did love his wife.

**It's not what it seems  
Not what you think  
No I must be dreaming**

"-Hermione."

"No, I won't do this, I can't do this anymore Draco."

"No-"

"It has to end Draco, I can't. We can't be together anymore." Hermione said, letting the final words speak for themselves. She looked him soulfully in the eyes, and almost regretted what she said. She saw the pain, the cruelty and anger through his eyes and she honestly did not want it to be pointed at her. But the deed was done.

Hermione looked down, in order to ignore the stares he was giving her. She wriggled her ring finger off her left hand that had been sitting there for over four years and gave it back to Draco, curling his fist around the ring.

"Take it Draco, and give it to someone who will deserve it, I'm just not that person."

It broke her heart to say these words but this war, it had been going on this long. This war was tearing their marriage apart and she just couldn't handle it anymore. She shouldn't have to suffer anymore.

**It's only in my mind  
Not in real life  
No I must be dreaming  
**

Draco tried to struggle his emotions as he saw the tears pouring down his wife's face. He wanted her to be happy, and didn't think he could surrender her happiness without him. They were married, till death due their part.

"Hermione, please don't do this." He finally managed to say.

Hermione turned to face him, tear streaking and everything. "Tell me you love me, that's all I ask."

Draco had never once told anyone he loved them, not even his mother. Not it would do any good, since she was rolling in her grave anyways. He loved Hermione, as much as he was prejudiced against mud- _muggle-borns_. His father had attempted to remove him from his family when Draco was engaged, then tried to stop the wedding. And now this, he'd attempted to kill Hermione. It was enough to make anyone filled with anger. But Draco knew his mission and couldn't betray his father or the Dark Lord.

He'd always had to make that decision, everyday; his wife or the Dark Lord? He always pictured the perfect life, where a war wasn't raging on, him with a wife raising a family. But he couldn't have any of it. He was a selfish bastard and he knew it. "Why couldn't he have his cake and eat it too?" was a famous quote he'd heard a long time ago and only wished it were half true.

**Not what it seems  
Not what you think  
I must be dreaming**

Their marriage life was no where near perfect and because of him; she had lost the two most important people in her life. They weren't dead, they despised him and because of that they turned their backs on her, their best friend. Saint Potter and Weaselbe, once part of the Golden Trio was no more. Draco knew more than he should have that it was because of him that Hermione had no one left in her life. It was because of him that the war was still raging on, because of him; his wife had to choose between him and her friends.

He thought that once they were married things would turn out for the better but he was wrong. Draco had continued to follow the Dark Lord even though Hermione had forbidden him, he had no choice anymore. He wanted nothing more than to walk away, but walking away from the Dark Lord without punishment was impossible.

He knew the second he turned his back on his Lord, he'd be sentenced to death. Voldermort wouldn't take weaklings. Draco didn't know how much it actually hurt Hermione that he was a death eater. He killed millions of innocent people, and at times he was ashamed and guilty of what he'd done, but he couldn't take it back. Back in the days, during Hogwarts, he'd been known as the Slytherin 'Sex' God, and he'd live up to the reputation, and Hermione was right, he was a cheater, despite loving her, he couldn't help but feel for another women's well being. It wasn't like Hermione had refused to sleep with him, but sometimes she was too much to handle and he needed someone else to release his physical attention.

Most nights after a night with the Death Eaters, Draco was known to drink way to many firewhiskey's, trying to drown his sorrows. But nothing seemed to work, nothing could make the pain go away.

Draco had no choice; he had to let her go.

"I-…"

Hermione shook her head, she knew it, after everything they've been through, and she knew she was living a lie. A dream; where reality was just the next chapter. She told herself that this was for the best, marrying a man she thought she loved, or that he loved her, but she was fooled. By his lies, she didn't know how she had handled it this long.

"I knew it; I knew you couldn't tell me the truth! For once in your life Draco, I hope you're happy."

Hermione took out her wand and whispered an incantation, and her luggage full of her stuff came tumbling down the stairs in front of the door.

"Goodbye Draco."

Without looking back, Hermione left the Malfoy Manor, never having to return again, she would return to the people she had so long ago betrayed. All because of a man she thought he loved her. Not only was she leaving the man she'd spent four years of marriage with, but now a child was growing within her, and Draco would never know the truth of its existence. In Hermione's eyes, Draco was dead to her. He was not the man she fell in love with. He was no one, and he was no 'Husband' of hers.

As Hermione left, Draco stood there shocked, he didn't actually think she would leave him, but he never gave her a reason to stay either. He felt his heart breaking as the thought that he was alone, and alone for good. His death was soon to come, and he knew that no one would be there to watch him fall.

"I do love you Hermione, and I always will." He whispered into the air, and he felt his legs crumbled to ground, and the unshed tears fall down his face. He would never be happy again, he would die knowing he let the one women he loved go.

**Just in my mind  
Not in real life  
I must be dreaming**

The End.

Natural-181


End file.
